Who are these guys and what have they done with my Diamondbacks?

Ok, the last time I checked the Oakland Athletics were a good team. In fact I could have sworn that they were leading the American League Western Division. So if that’s true, why are the Diamondbacks winning this series?

Sure, the first game of the series could have just been a fluke when the Diamondbacks behind Claudio Vargas win 6-4. I could have said, “Well Brad Halsey was a former Diamondback so you can’t expect him to hold a lead.” I could easily justify the win on Friday as an anomaly. But I have no explanation for Saturday.

Who in their wildest dreams would ever have imagined that Miguel Batista would take a perfect game into the seventh inning? This is the same Miguel Batista who was a closer in Canada last year for the Toronto Blue Jays. This is the same Miguel Batista who writes poetry in his spare time and wants to be considered a serious author. This is not the kind of pitcher you expect to throw a no hitter. This is barely the kind of pitcher you expect to still be in the ball game when the seventh inning starts. But in this new Bizzaro world we find that Miggy is a dominating pitcher who totally controls the game and throws a complete game 3-hitter to beat the Oakland Athletics.

Now after two games where the Diamondbacks totally dominate the A’s, they send Brandon Webb to the mound to duel with Barry Zito. Brandon began the year pitching like Batista did yesterday but lately has fallen on some bad luck. That is until he faces ace Barry Zito. Then Brandon gets his grove back and throws a complete game 4-hitter to win the game and sweep the A’s.

I have no idea who these 25 guys are or what they have done with the real Arizona Diamondbacks but I’m behind them. I keep thinking this is one of those movies where aliens come down, abduct a bunch of humans and replace them with evil clones made from pods and creepy music. I expect that at any moment their heads will pop off and creatures with 4 arms will appear. And I am totally cool with that happening as long as they keep winning and can strike out Barry Bonds.

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