Baseball, It’s to Die For

Some times you have to wonder where to draw the line. Well it’s not so much that I wonder where lines are drawn; I am usually the one erasing the existing line. It is Trina who normally wonders where the old line was at and why I thought it was a good idea to get rid of a perfectly good line. My life has been one that has a well defined precedence and pattern of being just slightly to the left of normal. It’s not that there is anything wrong with middle of the road kind of people, I just tend to be more interested in the strange things you find on the shoulder of the road. My passion for the Diamondbacks is a perfect example. I could have easily been one of those guys who found 5 or 6 friends and got together to purchase season tickets. We could have met and divvied up the tickets and each gone to 16 games a year. Spread over the course of a six month season that would be 2-3 games a month. Instead I chose the more obscure path and bought season tickets and attended every home game and then tried to talk my family into exotic vacation spots such as Wrigley Field or Joe Robbe Stadium just to get in a few extra games on the road. So when I began this blog I let my family help me come up with the title. They had no trouble settling on Diary of a Diehard as it seemed to best fit my personality. But exactly where should the line be drawn for team loyalty?

When the team was formed in 1995 I was there to see the logo unveiled. I was at America West Arena the day season tickets deposits were accepted and bought my first Diamondbacks hat that day. I have a closet filled with purple, turquoise, copper, and black. I have 53 different Diamondbacks hats and more shirts than I care to think about all with the Arizona Diamondbacks logo. I usually do my Mother’s Day shopping at the Diamondbacks Team Shop (much to the chagrin of my wife) and we have spent numerous birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays at Bank One Ballpark/Chase Field. I have 2 seats from Bank One Ballpark at my house which have been incorporated into our family room décor (Trina calls it the Diamondbacks Shrine) and a vast array of bobbleheads sprinkled throughout the house. These things are just a normal part of my life and things that my family just seems to take for granted. When Trina or the kids are asked what is up with their father and the Diamondbacks they merely reply “Oh he lives and breathes Diamondback baseball” as if every family is the same way,

Now though with the recent press release by Major League Baseball my family is again questioning whether I may have moved that line just a little too far. First I have to credit the marketing genius of MLB properties. What other sporting venture would have thought to capitalize on dead people? My theory is that there were enough people who keeled over when the Red Sox finally won a World Series that they could see the dollar signs spinning like a Las Vegas slot machine. Finally a fan can get a little respect in the life here after by coming in a casket or urn decorated for their favorite team. I definitely need to get my hands on one of these Arizona Diamondbacks caskets. How sweet would it be to have that “A” logo adorning the lid as they lay you down in your final resting place? I can just hear the pall bearers, “Now that guy is a REAL fan.” This opens up so many opportunities. Instead of flowers you could have ivy and you could decorate the funeral home in bunting just like Opening Day. At the door as people entered you could sell programs with lifetime statistics of all the players. You could even sing God Bless America part way through the service to allow everyone to stretch. It would be great for ex-wives too as this could be the ultimate revenge on your ex-husband when you have him buried in a Yankees casket. Yeah I like this idea a lot. I just need to hurry and order a Diamondbacks casket before they change the colors from purple, turquoise and copper to Sedona red, Sonoran sand, and black. Being buried in the new color scheme would be enough to bring a guy back from the dead.

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