A Touch of the Green

According to most calendars, tomorrow is St. Patrick’s Day. I’m not Irish though but I have used Irish Spring soap before so I try to join in on the festivities however I can. In our house that means two things. First, it is the one time each year that I get to wear my green Diamondbacks hat. Back in 1999 the team sold this hat and wore it for St. Patrick’s Day during Spring Training. I of course bought one of the hats because I can’t pass up a Diamondbacks hat. I keep it neatly tucked away and bring it out once a year just for this occasion. The second thing St. Patrick’s Day means at our house is that I get to make breakfast. The kids both look forward to this event and dread it’s coming at the same time. I try to make a breakfast that will get everyone in the mood for the festivities. You may be wondering, what is it that he could possibly make to get into the spirit of the holiday? Way back in my youth I obtained a recipe from an old doctor that made the perfect breakfast for March 17 and I have diligently fixed it each year to commemorate whatever it is that St. Patrick’s Day commemorates. Our traditional mean consists of light and fluffy eggs whipped more than the 2004 Arizona Diamondbacks combined with a dash of sparkling water and nine drops of McCormick’s green food coloring. These are cooked until firm and gently folded onto a plate and served with a slice of spiral cut honey-baked ham. The plate is then served at the table inside of an ornate box. My doctor friend called it “green eggs and ham”. I think he also suggested that you eat this with a good looking woman but since I have gotten married, that part of the recipe seems to have been torn off by my wife. You are probably asking why am I telling you this a day before the big holiday?

Well I am just as confused as you are. Looking at the Diamondbacks Spring Training calendar I fully expected that Arizona would be playing the Oakland Athletics on St. Patrick’s Day. What would be more important than seeing the home team beat up on a team of American League leprechauns? Imagine my surprise then to see the Oakland game schedule for March 16 rather than March 17. Perhaps this is a result of some leap year rounding error that occurs in years divisible by 9 that results in St. Patrick’s Day coming 24 hours earlier. Well not wanting to look stupid I went with the flow and moved all of the festivities up a day. The Diamondbacks schedule shows the team playing in Surprise tomorrow against the Kansas City Royals. Yeah I bet it will be a surprise when the Royals show up wearing green tomorrow unaware that the missed the holiday by a day. Boy are they going to feel stupid! So let me be the first to wish each and every one of you a shamrock of a day! We’ll see you at the ballpark tonight rooting for the snakes to catch those little guys with the green jerseys and hats so that we can get their pot of gold. I only hope that the sponsor of tonight’s game is General Mills because I really would like to get a free box of Lucky Charms. I love the red hearts, yellow moons, orange stars, green clovers and especially the new blue diamonds.

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