The Webbruary Report

Happy Webbruary! There is nothing more rewarding that when you finally get to turn the page to the calendar and realize that the year has flown by and you are now in the month of Webbruary. What is that, your calendar doesn’t have a Webbruary? Well it sounds to me like you got yourself a defective calendar and I would place the blame squarely on the Hallmark Corporation because we all know they are the evil geniuses behind all calendar conspiracies. I say that because Hallmark has more to gain by changing the calendar than any other organization in the world. If you don’t believe me I challenge you to go into a Hallmark store and see how many different greeting cards they make and for what occasions. The last time I was in a Hallmark store looking for a card I would have sworn I found one congratulating my dog for successfully completing obedience training. I had no idea Dog Obedience Training Day was even a holiday but according to Hallmark it is. But I think in the case of Webbruary even the Hallmark people were surprised.


I would love to take credit for coining the term Webbruary but I can’t. That distinction goes to the people at Fox Sports who came up with the term to recognize the day when Diamondbacks pitchers and catchers report to Spring Training. You see it is the first day Brandon Webb and the rest of the Diamondbacks pitching staff arrive at Kino Sports Park in Tucson to begin their baseball season. So if I stopped to think about it Webbruary is not a holiday at all, it is a work day; the first day of work to be exact. Oh man, did I really mess up. I have been working since January 2 of this year which means I have put in 45 days of work that I probably didn’t need to. I wonder if I talk to my boss if he will maybe give me 45 days off later in the season to make up for my mistake? To commemorate the beginning of Webbruary Fox Sports Arizona will be re-broadcasting several Diamondbacks baseball games from last season featuring Brandon Webb. What a great gift and to think I didn’t get Fox Sports Arizona anything; I feel so cheap. I planned to take advantage of this gift to its fullest extent but just in case I happened to swallow a chicken bone or Commissioner Selig flashes the “bat signal” beckoning me to go and fight anti-baseball crime I did set my Tivo to record the games. I was once a Boy Scout (until I found out that you never were allowed to go on co-ed campouts with the Girl Scouts) and that taught me the value of being prepared. You never know when there might be an off-day during the season and you just have to see a game. So for a brief moment (well in this case several hours of dedicated programming) I was able to relive some of the memories from the 2007 season. One game that was shown was the Saturday August 11 game against the Washington Nationals. You knew it was a Saturday game due to the fact that the Diamondbacks were at home and wearing their black jerseys which by the way are the jersey where they have the best record of all the new color combinations. In this game Brandon Webb threw a complete game shutout allowing just 5 hits while striking out 10 batters winning the contest 1-0. It was a great game the first time and even better the second time. I do have to admit, watching a Diamondbacks home game on television is like having an out-of-body experience. Every time a foul ball went down the left field line I looked to see if I could see myself in the stands. I am not an expert on time travel so I am not exactly sure what would happen if my today self actually came in contact with my old self. It just might cause a rip in the time space continuum and I just cannot be held responsible for that so I decided to quit trying to find myself. Fortunately the two Jeff Summers did not meet although I am sure they both enjoyed the game. As an added benefit of Webbruary I decided to score the game from home which is more difficult than at the game due to all the distractions like Trina yelling at me for throwing peanut shells on the family room floor. Who knew that we didn’t have people that came in and cleaned up after the game at home? I was very happy to see that my scorebook for Webbruary matched the scorebook from August 11. I’m not sure what I would have done if the outcome of the game would have been recorded differently. All in all it was a great way to begin Webbruary and I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings.


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