“You know what today is don’t you?” an obvious trick question from my wife to start the day.
“Of course I know what day it is. I have been waiting for this day to come for months. I have been eagerly planning every move I would make this day so it is the most memorable day of the year,” I said confidently. “I mean we’ve only been waiting 133 days 15 hours 14 minutes and 34 seconds for this. Position players for the Arizona Diamondbacks report to Spring Training!”
From the somewhat puzzled look on her face I could tell that she had forgotten it was such a monumental day in our lives. The long dark winter was over, the players were back in town and soon the air would be filled with the sounds of baseballs hitting a mitt, the crack of the bat, and the smells of fresh cut grass. Just the thoughts of these things had my heart racing. How in the world could she have forgotten something as important as this? Before I could even utter a syllable of how disappointed I was that she had forgotten this special day she said, “today is Valentine’s Day.”
Wait, what? What kind of idiot would schedule Valentine’s Day to be the same day as position players reporting to Spring Training? In the back of my mind I was already formulating a nasty email to the Hallmark Corporation. I was pretty sure they were behind this fiasco with their little greeting card and calendar monopoly filling women’s heads with hearts and cupids instead of fastballs and sliders.