Is Baseball a Disease?

Now that Spring Training workouts have officially started, things around our house just got real. When the Arizona Diamondbacks have their first Cactus League game on February 26th it will signify the end of my off-season life.

The existence of a diehard baseball fans is very similar to being diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. This is not meant to trivialize a serious disease but rather to remind each of us that at best a doctor’s diagnosis is an educated guess. Let me give you an example so you can see what I mean.

SurgeryIf you go to webmd.com (a site I have bookmarked to give me great ideas to put on my doctor’s note when I want to skip out of real life and go down to the ballpark) you will see the symptoms for Bipolar Disorder:

Bipolar disorder, with its extreme mood swings from depression to mania, used to be called manic depressive disorder. Bipolar disorder is very serious and can cause risky behavior, even suicidal tendencies, and can be treated with therapy and medication.

That could pretty much describe a diehard baseball fan perfectly. Extreme mood swings are a result of our favorite team winning or losing any given night of the season. Sometimes we are bouncing off the walls after a come from behind victory while at other times we have almost suicidal tendencies when the bullpen blows a save.

And don’t even get me started about what happens when the season ends and your team misses the playoffs. That can make even the sanest of fans go as my grandfather used to put it, “shakier than Uncle Willie after three bottles of moonshine”.

As bad as it is for a Diamondbacks fan, think about how it must be if you were a Chicago Cubs fan. Is it any wonder why those guys are praying to goats and ostracizing fans named after one of The Simpsons characters? There is not enough therapy and medication in the world to cure you from being a Cubs fan.

Maybe it’s not medication that we need; maybe we just need baseball to last a little longer each year. Instead of the government wanting to help all of us with affordable health care they should instead focus on the root of the problem, not enough baseball.

So next time you start to feel like you might be coming down with something just take in two ballgames and call me in the morning.


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