Diary of a Diehard

I had the day all planned out. I would get up, have a little breakfast, read the newspaper (well, specifically I would read the sports page. Okay, I would study the box scores, evaluate the pitching match-ups, review the write-up from yesterday’s game, and examine how the Florida Marlins hitters have done in their career against Randy Johnson), then get ready to watch the Arizona Diamondbacks game. The plan was foolproof, except I couldn’t anticipate the adverse weather in southern Florida. So there I sat with my Diamondbacks jersey and hat tuned into the television broadcast with 2 minutes to go before the first pitch. The final commercial was ending and the game was about to start. But instead of seeing Randy Johnson and the Diamondbacks, I was treated to a Three Stooges marathon. What was this, some kind of sick joke? They wouldn’t dare pre-empt the Diamondbacks, not even for something as good as the Three Stooges. I frantically rushed around to find the television guide to verify that the game was supposed to be on. At about that time, I saw on the screen that the game was in a rain delay. Whew, that was a close one. After an hour of laughing my guts out at Mo smacking Curly around, the Diamondbacks game began. It was Randy Johnson’s thirty-seventh birthday and he planned a big party for himself. In the first inning, he struck out Luis Castillo for his 300th strikeout of the season. He then followed that up in the fourth inning when he struck out Mike Lowell to collect his 3,000th career strikeout. It was cool to see that accomplishment. There are only twelve men who have accomplished this and I have seen three of them do it. I watched as Steve Carlton each recorded their 3,000th strikeouts. It was an incredible sight and I am grateful to have been there to witness it. So even though the Diamondbacks didn’t win the game and there was a rain delay, I saw two of the greatest events in television. Randy Johnson’s 3,000th strikeout and the Three Stooges. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Our neighborhood is mostly made up of families that have children near the same age as ours. Of course, when you have five children, it is easy to find someone the same age as one of yours. As Dakota has gotten older, he has found a couple of kids in the neighborhood with which to hang out. He is a year younger than both of his friends but he is fairly mature for his age so that makes up the difference mentally. Physically, he still trails the other two boys, or at least that is what I thought. We were outside working on the yard and Dakota was playing with one of the neighbor boys. This particular kid has a tendency to be a bully and push the other kids around. I am a firm believer in letting the kids fight their own battles as they have a way of evening things out. Today, the neighbor kid wanted the baseball bat that Dakota was playing with. Dakota on the other hand wanted to play with it himself and since it was his and possession is 9/10 of the law, he felt he had a pretty good basis. The other boy was persistent and decided force would be necessary if he were to get his way. He approached Dakota fairly aggressively and out of the corner of my eye, I decided to watch this impending battle. The boy grabbed the bat and attempted to take it away from Dakota. Dakota on the other hand had a fairly firm grip which stalled the battle. With his other hand, Dakota straight armed the boy causing him to go down. The older kid was not used to losing the battle and therefore didn’t know when to give up. He attempted to take the bat again but Dakota again stood his ground and the older boy was denied. This made the older boy a tad angry and that is when he made a fatal error in judgment. He got himself up off the ground and began to march back to his house. Half way there, he stopped and picked up a rock and flung it at Dakota. Now usually, seeing a rock hurdling at your son will make a parent flinch, especially if it looks like it is coming at him with some force chest high. But in that instant that I wanted to call out to Dakota to duck, a most amazing thing happened. Standing there with a bat in his hand, he did the most natural thing he could think of. He raised the bat and smacked the incoming rock with a large crack, the rock was sent back in the general direction from which it came. Perhaps general direction was an understatement. The rock flew back and smacked the kid right in the forehead causing him to jump up and down as a big knot began to form between his eyes. Trina and the mother of course went running over to check on the would-be bully. I on the other hand went over and congratulated Dakota on a marvelous hit. My admiration for my son’s skills lasted only momentarily until Trina came over to chastise us both for being so barbaric. In unison, we both declared, “he started it.” Regardless, we were both grounded and Dakota was banished from the bat for a week. Women just don’t understand.

Even though Tiffany wanted to go to school yesterday, we kept her home in order to keep an eye on her. The dentist explained that her body may be going through some shock and that we should keep an eye on her. By today though, it would have taken a train to keep her from going to school. I am not positive, but I think the reason she wanted to go to school had little to do with getting an education and more to do with finally have a killer show-and-tell item to share with her class. After all, it’s not every day that you have convertible teeth that you can take in and out. It is good that she is adapting well to this problem. The dentist told us that she would need three root canals done over the course of the next several weeks. He also stated that there was a 60 percent chance that her body would reject the teeth that were knocked out. With that news, my mind raced through what would happen should that be the case. The first thing I thought of was the movie Deliverance. Was Tiffany going to be one of those hillbillies that sat on her front porch and played the banjo while wearing overalls? That was not something I was ready to accept. She has always been such a beautiful little girl, I wasn’t ready for her to become a FLK (Funny Looking Kid) just yet. I was hoping that dentistry had progressed so that this type of thing didn’t happen. To her credit, Tiffany is following the doctors orders to the letter. I guess there is not a lot we can now do except wait and see how things progress. Hmmm, I wonder if eBay has any auctions going for straw hats, rocking chairs, and banjos?

Throughout the night, I replayed the events from the previous night in my head. Seeing Tiffany there struggling to keep her teeth and mouth intact was nearly more than I could bear. When we got to the dentist, his office was closed but he was there waiting for us. He quickly examined Tiffany and then went right to work. Because he was alone at the office, Trina became a dental assistant. Although she has not been trained to do this job, I have heard her threaten me on numerous occasions that she would knock my teeth out so I knew she would be fine in this instance. The doctor unwrapped the tooth that had been knocked out and held it up. My first impression was, there was no way that was going to back into her mouth. The root was huge and the hole left in her mouth was quite small. But with a quick flip of his hand, he stuck the tooth back in place. I stood there amazed. It was like watching a magician do a trick. You saw it happen but you had now idea how he did it. The doctor then went to work on the other two teeth moving them around and standing back asking us if that was how they went. It was an eerie feeling watching him mold my daughter’s mouth like playing with Play-doh. When he finally had them situated, he wired them together just like braces. Tiffany, to her credit was tough as nails. I would have been passed out cold. She just sat there and took it. Trina on the other hand was having a ball. She had all kind of gadgets sitting around and she was working them all. She had that suction thing going and was vacuuming Tiffany’s mouth out with regularity. Then she was handing the dentist instruments working like a team. It was like watching oral ER. I was pretty impressed with the whole situation. When they were done, it looked like Tiffany was wearing braces. She was told that she could not chew with those teeth for a couple of weeks. She listened to the doctor’s instructions carefully and when he asked if she had any questions, she only had two. When could she go back to school and when could she return to gymnastics? My admiration of my daughter went way up through this experience.

In what has become a weekly routine, Trina takes Tiffany to gymnastics on Wednesdays and I am to pick her up. Tiffany has progressed quickly through the ranks of the gymnastics classes and after only four short months she is now on the gymnastics team. Her first meet is in October and she is working hard in order to get ready. She has natural talent for this and many of the moves have come easy for her. Her coaches are very impressed with her discipline as well as her talent. Tonight as with every other practice, the girls broke up into small groups and rotated to the various stations to work on each apparatus. Tiffany began with the vault and did very well. This is her specialty and she takes pride in the handstands and flips that she does. After the vault, she moved to the balance beam. This is the one area that fascinates me. I cannot imagine trying to stand on this four inch wide piece of wood let alone try to do tricks on it. Tiffany holds her own on the beam and is now progressing to the point where she can do a cartwheel on the beam with regularity. Today, she was working on handstands on the beam and then dismounting the beam. During her dismount, Tiffany overextended in the flip and instead of landing on her feet, she fell forwards. This would have been fine if she would have landed on the mat. Instead, she fell head first onto the beam, hitting her mouth on the bar as she came down. It immediately knocked one of her front permanent teeth out onto the floor. Two other teeth were driven back into her mouth. To her credit, she did not cry. She immediately took the tooth on the floor and wrapped it up. A call was made to Trina who quickly made her way to the gym. Phone calls were made and we finally found a dentist that would meet us in his office as soon as we could get there. It was going to be a long night and one that would be filled with pain for Tiffany. I have realized that as a parent, there is nothing worse than watching one of your children suffer. I would gladly trade places with Tiffany in a second if it meant that she would not have to suffer.

The Arizona Diamondbacks started a six game two city road trip today in Atlanta Georgia. I remember looking at the schedule before the season started and thinking that perhaps this series would determine the best team in the National League and may even be a preview of the National League Championship series. After all, these two teams have the best pitching staffs in baseball. But as the season played out and the Diamondbacks struggled to score runs and their pitching staff struggled to get outs, I find myself watching this game with the hopes that the Diamondbacks can win this game and this series then pray that the San Francisco Giants fall flat in the last two weeks so that we can catch them. But there are an awful lot of ifs in that sentence and not near enough reality in this fantasy. Nonetheless, I was hopeful as I turned on the television to watch the game. About the only good thing about playing the Atlanta Braves is that they are ALWAYS on television. There is something to be said about being owned by a media conglomerate. The game was close and it almost looked like the Diamondbacks were going to pull it out. That is until Larry “Chipper” Jones took matters into his own hands and smacked Diamondbacks pitchers around like a targets in a shooting gallery. By the end of the game, the Diamondbacks had lost and to top it off the Giants had won again. I really am beginning not to like Larry very much. By the time he finished his post game interview and brag session I was mad enough that I put a curse on his dog. That ought to teach him.

Each year, Labor Day is signified by two dissimilar events. First, it is generally regarded as the end of summer. That time where the weather starts to turn cooler and we’re given one last three-day weekend before the busy fall and winter begin with the holidays just around the corner. I have often found it strange that we have this holiday to begin with. Never having been pregnant myself and watching my wife go through it six times, I cannot for the life of me see why we would celebrate the pain a woman goes through during child birth. But who am I to argue with an extra day off to hang out and watch baseball?

Continue reading ‘Helping Jerry’s Kids’ »

It’s funny how fickle baseball fans can be. Only last season as the Diamondbacks were on their way to a 100 win season and a National League West divisional championship, people were coming out of the woodwork claiming to be diehard Diamondbacks fans. From the looks at the local mall, the Team Shop did very well during this love affair with a winner. This year though, those people wearing their faded NL West Championship T-shirts are no where near the ballpark. Instead, they have been replaced with the dreaded invisible fan. Even with Arizona being only 5 games out of first place, many of the fans have given up on the team. “This team stinks!” seems to be their battle cry. Many are calling for Buck Showalter’s head if the Diamondbacks fail to make the play-offs. I find it interesting what a difference 13 games make. Over the course of the first 136 games of the season, if the Diamondbacks would have won 13 more games, they would be on pace to repeat their 100 win season. I can almost bet that Buck Showalter would hear none of the comments he is now faced with. Instead, we would be hearing what a genius he is and what a travesty it would be if he did not win Manager of the Year. But here we sit, only 26 games remaining and payment due for post season tickets. Several people who sit around me have claimed disgust at the prospect of having to fork out money when it is clear that Arizona will never make the play-offs. I happen to be more of a glass half full kind of guy. Given the right circumstances, I think this team will make a run before the season is out. If and when that happens, I want to be there to support the team. With that confidence in hand, I take my checkbook in hand and march into the Guest Relations office to pay for my play-off tickets. I for one will be here to support Buck and the boys. Besides, it’s either go to a ballgame or stay at home with Trina’s honey-do list. I may have been born at night, but it wasn’t last night.

I’ve lived in the Phoenix area for six-and-one-half years and I am still not accustomed to the summer weather. I remember when we first moved down here. It was in April and the weather was great. Highs were in the upper seventies and lows in the sixties. It was like perpetual summer. My kids were swimming and we thought the natives from Arizona were crazy when they told us that it was still to cold to swim. Then summer hit. Temperatures were in the upper one-tens and if you stood to long on the concrete without moving, your shoes would melt to the sidewalk. Whenever I made a comment as to the heat, I was always given the same answer, “but it’s a dry heat.” Yeah, my oven’s a dry heat too but I don’t go sticking my head in it. When the Diamondbacks were created and they were designing the stadium, I had to wonder how they were going to deal with the heat. I cannot imagine an extra innings afternoon game that stretches over four hours in 120 degree heat. That would be worse for baseball than the designated hitter. The Diamondbacks obviously understood this and therefore designed a domed stadium. Of course, baseball is supposed to be played outdoors and on real grass, neither of which can be accomplished with a dome. The design therefore was one where the roof may be opened and closed depending on the weather. Typically, that means that the Diamondbacks play with the roof open in April and part of May. They play indoors with the roof closed during the hot months of June through the first part of September. Lately though, the weather has begun to cool down and I knew it wouldn’t be long before we would once again be able to play under the stars. As I arrived at the game today, I had on my shorts and a T-shirt and my flip-flops which is the standard uniform that I usually wear to the game. I sat in my seat filling out my scorecard preparing for the upcoming game. With 20 minutes before the first pitch, I stopped dead in my tracks, my pen hovering over Steve Finley’s name in the number five spot. Had my ears deceived me? I had not heard this sound for nearly four months. It was the roof opening music! Tonight, we would be playing wide open. There is nothing quite as cool as having the roof open and 40,000 fans cheering the Diamondbacks. Man I love this game.